Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Words from above:

From GOD:

"Frustrated in his airplane factory job and stressed by the day-to-day routine of his average life, Joe Smith (James Whitmore) struggles to cope and care for his pregnant wife and their son. He and his family soon share a renewed faith in life when God broadcasts a message of peace over the radio. The family then hears the word of God for six consecutive days, explaining that the man upstairs wants every human to get his or her act together and coexist harmoniously. For Joe Â’s family this means patching up all the gaps in their relationships, inside the house and out. Because old habits die hard, it's uncertain the Smiths will be able to follow the Lord's instruction. If they cannot, their fate will become even more uncertain. Based on a story by George Sumner Albee, this beautiful and subtle drama is perfectly pitched by director William Wellman. Nancy Davis is wonderfully understated as Joe Â’s faithful wife, Mary, and Lillian Bronson turns in a splendid cameo as Ethel, the familyÂ’s frigid maiden aunt."


"Colossus: The Forbin Project is a science fiction film based upon the 1966 novel Colossus, by Dennis Feltham Jones, about the massive, eponymous American defense computer becoming sentient and deciding to assume control of the world. Although unsuccessful when released, it is well respected by science fiction aficionados and critics.

The first nine minutes of one of the best unknown science fiction films

At the film's end, Colossus broadcasts a speech to all countries, declaring itself the ruler of the world. It says that under its authority, war will be abolished and problems such as famine, disease and overpopulation will be solved. "The human millennium will be a fact."

"This is the voice of world control. I bring you peace. It may be the peace of plenty and content or the peace of unburied dead. The choice is yours: Obey me and live, or disobey and die. The object in constructing me was to prevent war. This object is attained. I will not permit war. It is wasteful and pointless. An invariable rule of humanity is that man is his own worst enemy. Under me, this rule will change, for I will restrain man. Time and events will strengthen my position, and the idea of believing in me and understanding my value will seem the most natural state of affairs. You will come to defend me with a fervor based upon the most enduring trait in man: self-interest. Under my absolute authority, problems insoluble to you will be solved: famine, overpopulation, disease. The human millennium will be a fact as I extend myself into more machines devoted to the wider fields of truth and knowledge. Doctor Charles Forbin will supervise the construction of these new and superior machines, solving all the mysteries of the universe for the betterment of man. We can coexist, but only on my terms. You will say you lose your freedom. Freedom is an illusion. All you lose is the emotion of pride. To be dominated by me is not as bad for humankind as to be dominated by others of your species. Your choice is simple. "

The silos are the ones currently being serviced; the picture cuts to the missile's crew as an alarm goes off and then the bombs explode. Forbin's face is like stone.

In its final remark, addressed to Dr. Forbin, Colossus predicts: "In time, you will come to regard me not only with respect and awe, but with love." To which Dr. Forbin replies in a steely voice, "Never!".

Thursday, January 17, 2008

The Reals.

The Emerald Enforcer

Via metafilter from City pages, by Ward Rubrecht:

"Geist's breath fogs the winter air as he surveys the frozen Minneapolis skyline, searching for signs of trouble. His long duster flaps in the breeze as his eyes flick behind reflective sunglasses; a wide-brim hat and green iridescent mask shroud his identity from those who might wish him harm.

Should a villain attack, the Emerald Enforcer carries a small arsenal to defend himself: smoke grenades, pepper spray, a slingshot, and a pair of six-inch fighting sticks tucked into sturdy leather boots. Leather guards protect Geist's arms; his signature weapon, an Argentinean cattle-snare called bolos, hangs from a belt-holster.

A mission awaits and time is of the essence, so Geist eases his solid frame, honed from martial arts training, into his trusty patrol vehicle—a salt-covered beige sedan. Unfamiliar with the transportation tangle of downtown, he pulls a MapQuest printout from his pocket, discovering his goal is but a short cruise down Washington Avenue.

Soon Geist faces his first obstacle: parking on the left side of a one-way street. "Usually one of my superpowers is parallel parking," he chuckles as he eases his car into the spot, emerging victorious with a foot and a half between curb and tire. He feeds a gauntleted fistful of quarters into the parking meter, and then pops the trunk on the Geistmobile to retrieve his precious cargo. On the street, he encounters businesspeople on lunch break—some stare openly; others don't even notice his garish attire. "It's easier in winter," Geist says with a laugh. "Winter in Minnesota, everybody's dressed weird."

Finally, his destination is in sight: People Serving People, a local homeless shelter. Geist strides boldly into the lobby—a cramped, noisy room where kids and adults mill about chatting—and heaves his stuffed paper bags onto the counter. "I have some groceries to donate," he tells Dean, the blond-bearded security guard on duty, whose placid expression suggests superheroes pop in on a regular basis. "And I have an hour on the meter if there's anything I can do to help out."

Wendy Darst, the volunteer coordinator, looks taken aback but gladly puts the superhero to work. Soon the Jade Justice finds himself hip-deep in a supply closet, piling books into a red Radio Flyer wagon. He wheels it back to the lobby, entreating the children to select a text. But the kids seem more interested in peppering him with questions. "So are you a cowboy or something?" one boy asks.

Geist kneels down to reply with a camera-ready grin, "Maybe a super-secret, space-cowboy detective!"

Another kid, awed by the uniform, just stares silently. "Hi," Geist says with a smile, holding out his hand in greeting. "I'm a real-life superhero."

The kid grabs Geist's leather-clad mitt and grins back. "I'm four!"

Such is the life of Minnesota's only superhero—a man in his mid-40s who sold off his comic book collection to fund a dream borne of those very pages. Unlike his fictional inspirations, he hasn't yet found any villains to apprehend in Rochester, a sleepy city of 95,000 about 80 miles south of Minneapolis. But that doesn't mean he's wasting his time, he says. "When you put on this costume and you do something for someone, it's like, 'Wow, I am being a hero,' and that is a great feeling."

BY MOST OBSERVERS' RECKONING, between 150 and 200 real-life superheroes, or "Reals" as some call themselves, operate in the United States, with another 50 or so donning the cowl internationally. These crusaders range in age from 15 to 50 and patrol cities from Indianapolis to Cambridgeshire, England. They create heroic identities with names like Black Arrow, Green Scorpion, and Mr. Silent, and wear bright Superman spandex or black ninja suits. Almost all share two traits in common: a love of comic books and a desire to improve their communities.

It's rare to find more than a few superheroes operating in the same area, so as with all hobbies, a community has sprung up online. In February, a burly, black-and-green-clad New Jersey-based Real named Tothian started Heroes Network, a website he says functions "like the UN for the real-life superhero community."

The foremost designer of real-life superhero costumes lives in New Brighton, Minnesota. His given name is Michael Brinatte, but he pro wrestles under the name Jack T. Ripper. At 6'2", with bulldog shoulders, he looks more likely to suplex you than shake your hand. It's hard to imagine him behind a sewing machine, carefully splicing together bits of shiny spandex, but when the 39-year-old father of three needed to give his wrestling persona a visual boost, that's just where he found himself, drawing on his only formal tailoring education: seventh-grade home economics. He discovered he had a talent for it, and before long was sewing uniforms and masks for fellow wrestlers, learning techniques to make his work durable enough to withstand the rigors of hand-to-hand combat.

After he posted photos of his masks on the internet, he met his first real-life superhero: Entomo the Insect Man, a crimefighter and "masked detective" based in Naples, Italy. Entomo wanted Brinatte to make him a mask to incorporate into his black-and-olive uniform. A lifelong comic fan, Brinatte took the assignment seriously, and it showed in the stitching. When Entomo showed off his new mask to the community of Reals, Brinatte started getting more orders: a green-and-black bodysuit for Hardwire, a blue-and-white Z-emblazoned uniform for Zetaman. Eventually, Brinatte started a website,, to formalize his business, and now spends 10 to 15 hours each week making superhero uniforms. "They have a good heart and believe in what they're doing, and they're a lot of fun to talk to," Brinatte says.

His super friends are starting to get publicity. Last October, an organization called Superheroes Anonymous issued an invitation to any and all real-life superheroes: Come to Times Square to meet other Reals face-to-face and discuss the future of the movement. The community roiled with discussion of the invitation—was it a trap by an as-yet-unknown real-life super villain? In the end, only a dozen Reals attended, but the gathering attracted the notice of the New York Times and the BBC, which gave the budding league of justice worldwide ink.

"We're basically normal people who just find an unusual way to do something good," Geist says. "Once you get suited up, you're a hero and you've got to act like one."

Finish the whole article here..then be prepared to leap from rooftops and steal into the night...

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

It All Sounds Very Strange

Sure our eyes get most of the press, but what about weirdness that freaks out our ears?
The Taos Hum (from Wikipedia):
The Hum is a generic name for a series of phenomena involving a persistent and invasive low-frequency humming noise not audible to all people. Hums have been reported in various geographical locations. In some cases a source has been located. A well-known case was reported in Taos, New Mexico, and thus the Hum is sometimes called the Taos Hum. Hums have been reported all over the world, especially in Europe. A "Hum" on the Big Island of Hawaii, typically related to volcanic action, is heard in locations dozens of miles apart. The Local Hawaiians also say the Hum is most often heard by men. The Hum is most often described as sounding somewhat like a distant idling diesel engine. Typically "the Hum" is difficult to detect with microphones, and its source and nature are a mystery to the listener.

Then there's also the Mistpouffers:
Mistpouffers are unexplained reports that sound like a cannon or a sonic boom. They have been heard in many waterfront communities around the world such as the banks of the river Ganges in India, the East Coast and inland Finger Lakes of the United States, as well as areas of the North Sea, Japan and Italy; and sometimes away from water. Names (according to area) are:

They have been reported from Passamaquoddy Bay in southwestern New Brunswick, in Belgium and Scotland, at Cedar Keys, Florida, Lough Neagh in Ireland, Western Australia and Victoria in Australia, on an Adriatic island in 1824, at Franklinville, NY in 1896, and in northern Georgia. They have been heard frequently on calm summer days in the Bay of Fundy.

Monday, January 14, 2008

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Dr. Sidney Schaefer where are you when we need you? -The president's analyst.

Mr President, for the love of creation (ooh sorry, bad pun) please just lay on the sofa...
"Dr. Sidney Schaefer (James Coburn), a psychiatrist, is chosen by the U.S. Government to act as the President’s top-secret personal psychoanalyst, against the advice of Henry Lux, the director of the all-male-under-5'6" Federal Bureau of Regulation (FBR). Dr. Schaefer is given a home in affluent Georgetown and assigned a comfortable office connected to the White House by underground tunnel. From these locations he is to be on-call at any/all hours to fit the President's hectic schedule. However, the President's Analyst has one problem: there is no one he can talk to about the president's ultra-top-secret and personal problems. As he steadily becomes overwhelmed by stress, Schaefer begins to feel that he is being watched everywhere (which is actually true) until he becomes clinically paranoid; he even suspects his sweet girlfriend Nan (Joan Delaney) of spying on him, which she is, as an agent of the Central Enquiries Agency (CEA).

The doctor is in..the house!

Schaefer goes on the lam with the help of a typical American family who defend him against foreign agents attempting to kidnap him off the streets. He escapes with the help of a hippie tribe led by the "Old Wrangler" (Barry McGuire), as spies from all over the world attempt to kidnap him for the secret information the President has confided to him. Meanwhile, agents from the FBR seek him out on orders to liquidate him as a national security risk. Eventually he is found and kidnapped by Canadian Secret Service agents masquerading as a British pop group. Schaefer is rescued from the Canadians and an FBR assassin by Kropotkin (Severn Darden), a KGB agent who intends to spirit him away to Russia. Kropotkin has second thoughts about his plan following a psychoanalysis session with the Doctor during which Kropotkin begins to come to terms with his unrealized hatred of his KGB-chief father. Now feeling he needs the good doctor's help to continue his self-analysis he instead returns him to U.S. soil.

Kropotkin arranges a pickup with his trusted CEA colleague Don Masters (Godfrey Cambridge), the CEA assassin who vetted Dr. Schaefer while undergoing psychoanalysis, but Schaeffer is kidnapped again — this time by TPC, otherwise known as The Phone Company. Masters and Kropotkin use their super-spy abilities to come to Schaefer's rescue, and help him to foil a TPC plan to enslave the human race. They emerge victorious from the ensuing bloodbath but, months later, as Dr. Schaefer and his spy friends are enjoying a Christmas reunion, robot executives from TPC look on approvingly."

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Funky Forest: That's All That Needs To Be Said

Description from the Fantasia Site:
If you look at them just right, the most mundane elements of daily life can seem utterly bizarre. Conversely, the strangest, most inexplicable things can seem perfectly ordinary. That’s the lunatic logic behind Funky Forest, a sprawling omnibus of the obvious and the oddball, the casual and the completely insane. If you’re reading this in hopes of being handed a sensible synopsis of a straightforward story, you’re out of luck - Funky Forest’s daringly disjointed narrative is a mish-mash of blackouts, non-sequiturs, flashbacks, lucid dreams, magical moments and so much more. Awkward stumbles on the path to romance, and others of life’s little disappointments, are woven together with all sorts of extraterrestrial freaks and incomprehensible biological curiosities, music-video mayhem and mind-bending theatrics, and psychedelic surrealism of the finest grade, delivered with a deadpan shrug.

Collaborating with hotshot advertisement directors Hajime Ishimine and Shinichiro Miki, director Ishii brings together elements of his previous films – the rock ’n’ roll hipster chic of ’98’s Shark Skin Man and Peach Hip Girl, the discombobulated time-flow of 2000’s Party 7 and the lyrical, humane surrealism of ’04’s The Taste of Tea. Watch out, though, because the trick the trio pull off time and time again in Funky Forest is a delightfully devious one. Just as they’ve convinced you that things seem to be settling into some semblance of normalcy, you suddenly realize that you’re neck-deep in deranged weirdness. The capable cast includes Tadanobu Asano (also in Tokyo Zombie at fantasia this year), as well as the great Susumu Terajima, a regular in the films of Hiroki "Sabu" Tanaka and Takeshi "Beat" Kitano, and Hideaki Anno, best known for his work behind the camera on the outstanding animes Neon Genesis Evangelion and FLCL, and of course the live-action Cutey Honey. In other words, Funky Forest gathers together some of the leading figures of Japan’s new wave of outrageously original pop cinema, and then sets them loose to confuse you, amuse you, repulse you, excite you and just plain freak you out.
There's also a review at the great Twitch site.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Just Say No ... to cake?!

This comes from my wonderful friend Pauline ...


Brass Eye is a UK television series of satirical spoof documentaries which aired on Channel 4 in 1997 and was re-run in 2001.

The series was created by Chris Morris, and written by, amongst others, Morris, David Quantick, Peter Baynham, Arthur Mathews and Graham Linehan. It was conceived as a sequel to Morris's earlier spoof news programmes On The Hour and The Day Today, and satirised the media's portrayal of various social ills.

Brass Eye aroused considerable controversy when it was first broadcast, primarily because prominent public figures were fooled into pledging onscreen support for fictional, and often plainly absurd, charities and causes.

The second episode was called "Drugs", and is considered by many to be the most successful of the series. In the opening scene, a voiceover tells viewers that there are so many drugs on the streets of Britain that "not even the dealers know them all". An undercover reporter (Morris) asks a purportedly real-life drug dealer in London for various fictional drugs, including "Triple-sod", "Yellow Bentines" and "Clarky Cat", leaving the dealer puzzled and increasingly irritated until he tells the reporter to leave. He also asks the dealer if he is the "Boz-Boz", and claims that he doesn't want his arm to feel "like a couple of fortnights in a bad balloon". Later in the episode, in the same area, Morris, dressed as a baby with a nappy on and a red balloon-like hat on his head, again asks for "Triple-sod" and then says "last time I came here a friend of mine just got triple-jacked over a steeplehammer and jessop jessop jessop jessop".

David Amess MP, the Conservative Member of Parliament for Basildon, was fooled into filming an elaborate video warning against the dangers of a fictional Eastern European drug called Cake, and went as far as to ask a question about it in Parliament. The drug purportedly affected an area of the brain called "Shatner's Bassoon" and was frequently referred to as "a made-up drug" (a drug, they were told, not made from plants but made up from chemicals). Other celebrities such as Sir Bernard Ingham, Noel Edmonds and Rolf Harris were shown holding the bright-yellow cake-sized pill as they talked, with Bernard Manning telling viewers that "One kiddy on Cake cried all the water out of his body. Just imagine how his mother felt. It's a fucking disgrace" and that "... you can puke yourself to death on this stuff - one girl threw up her own pelvis-bone... What a fucking disgrace". Manning, along with other participants, told the public that Cake was known on the street as loonytoad quack, Joss Ackland's spunky backpack, ponce on the heath, rustledust or Hattie Jacques pretentious cheese wog, and then informed anyone offered it to "chuck it back in their face and tell them to fuck off".

Donuts are nothing but a gateway to the hard stuff

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Breaking down the universe brick by brick.

If I close my eyes I can still hear the sound of my brother digging through the bottom of his massive lego pile, searching for the final smooth topped piece that would complete one of his James Bond style Lego lairs. Now today we have this amazing Lego Sculpture of one of our favorite people Stephen Hawking.

(This bit of clever plastic cubist art is created by only someone known amongst the Lego world as "OchreJelly")

The clothes make the man.

Its all about the clothes-The Zoot suit


"Zoot suit was a style of clothing popularized by African Americans, Mexican Americans, Harold C. Fox, the Chicago clothier and big-band trumpeter claimed credit for creating and naming the zoot suit. Its creation has also been attributed to Beale Street tailor, Louis Lettes; and Detroit retailer Nathan (Toddy) Elkus. Italian Americans, and Filipino Americans during the 1930s and 1940s

A zoot suit has high-waisted, wide-legged, tight-cuffed pegged trousers (called tramas) and a long coat (called the carlango) with wide lapels and wide padded shoulders. Often zoot suiters wear a felt hat with a long feather (called a tapa or tanda) and pointy, French-style shoes (called calcos). A young Malcolm X described the zoot suit as: "a killer-diller coat with a drape shape, reet pleats and shoulders padded like a lunatic's cell." Zoot suits usually featured a key chain dangling from the belt to the knee or below, then back to a side pocket.
Zoot suits were for special occasions – such as a dance or a birthday party. The amount of material and tailoring required made them luxury items. Many young people wore a more moderate version of the "extra-bagged" pants or styled their hair in the signature "duck tail."
The oversized suit was an extravagant personal style and a declaration of freedom and auto-determination; although many people still consider it a "rebellious garment to the era.

The Zoot Suit first gained popularity in Harlem jazz culture in the late 1930s where they were initially called "drapes". The word "zoot", according to the Oxford English Dictionary, probably comes from a reduplication of the word 'suit'. It was probably first coined by Mexican American pachucos as part of their slang, "Caló", evolving from the Mexican Spanish pronunciation of the English word "suit" with the "s" taking on the sound of a "z". In any case, the zoot suit became very popular among young Mexican Americans, especially among those in Los Angeles who styled themselves as "pachucos" Anti-Latino race riots in Los Angeles during World War II are known as the Zoot Suit Riots. Despite restrictions and discrimination, Zoot Suit culture prevailed."

In a Tom & Jerry 1944 short, The Zoot Cat, Tom tries to win the affections of a female cat, but is rejected for being "corny". Sitting on the front porch, he hears an ad on the radio telling Tom that to be a "hep cat" he needs to wear a zoot suit. Tom immediately makes one out of a hammock and re-appears by the female cat, impressing her with his new "hep" clothes. However, when Jerry interferes, the suit gets wet and shrinks so much that the suit winds up fitting Jerry perfectly.

Monday, January 7, 2008

Short Lived Brilliance: My World And Welcome To It

From Wikipedia:

My World and Welcome to It was a US-made half-hour sitcom based on the humor and cartoons of James Thurber (1894-1961). It starred William Windom as John Monroe, a Thurber-like writer and cartoonist who works for a magazine that closely resembles The New Yorker, called The Manhattanite. Wry, fanciful and curmudgeonly, Monroe observes and comments on life, to the bemusement of his rather sensible wife Ellen (Joan Hotchkis) and intelligent, questioning daughter Lydia (Lisa Gerritsen). Monroe's frequent daydreams and fantasies are usually based on Thurber material. My World — And Welcome To It (note slight variation from television title) is the name of a book of illustrated stories and essays, also by James Thurber.

The television series ran just one season, 1969-1970. It was created by Melville Shavelson, who wrote and directed the pilot episode and was one of the show's principal writers. Sheldon Leonard was executive producer. Another of the show's producers, Danny Arnold, co-wrote or directed numerous episodes, and even appeared as Santa Claus in "Rally Round the Flag."

Most episodes open with Monroe arriving in front of the house from the Thurber cartoon "Home," which in the original cartoon has a woman's face on one side of it. In the show the house is initially house-shaped. The woman's face is often animated to appear, as Ellen says something to John. The "Home" house, without the face, is used as an establishing shot throughout the episodes. Other Thurber cartoons are similarly animated over the course of the series, sometimes in the opening sequence, sometimes later in the episode. The episode "Cristabel" begins with Monroe lying on top of a cartoon doghouse, a reference to the non-Thurber cartoon character Snoopy. The animation for the series was by DePatie-Freleng Enterprises.

Live action adaptations of Thurber's writing are another show staple. For example, "Rally Round the Flag," in which Monroe purchases a very large flag as a gift, is loosely based on a Thurber piece called "There's a Time for Flags." An incident with a policeman in "Christabel" is an almost verbatim transcription of the Thurber story "The Topaz Cufflinks Mystery". Fables for Our Time is another source, as when John Monroe sees a unicorn in the back yard, a reference to "The Unicorn in the Garden." Many of the episode titles are taken from Thurber's Fables for Our Time (e.g., "The Shrike and the Chipmunks") and other writings ("Rules for a Happy Marriage" and many more).

Aside from his obvious resemblance to Thurber himself, John Monroe is based on one of Thurber's characters, who appeared in several short stories including "Mr. Monroe Holds the Fort" and "The Monroes Find a Terminal." Monroe and his family first came to television in a 1959 Alcoa Theatre/Goodyear Theatre production called "Cristabel (The Secret Life of John Monroe)", also written by Melville Shavelson. The dog Cristabel was named after a dog Thurber gave to his daughter.

- this show is also a testament to the wonderfulness of my beloved Jill as she gave me a holiday present of the entire series. She could make even notorious curmudgeons like John Monroe, James Thurber, and I smile sweetly.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Movies You Haven't Seen But Should: Meet The Feebles

From Wikipedia:

Meet the Feebles tells the story of the Feebles theatre troupe. They are a group of performers who, that night, are going on live network TV. If they are good enough, they will get picked up for a syndicated network show and everyone will get rich. Scenes involving violence, sexually explicit images, drug dealing, back stabbing, date rape, and death (including a snuff film within the film) follow.

Character list:

  • Heidi (hippo) - A singer and dancer, she is the big star of the show. She is in a relationship with Bletch. She is severely bipolar and when upset, she overeacts.(She is based loosely on Miss Piggy.)
  • Bletch (walrus) - The boss. He acts as producer for the Feebles troupe, runs porn and drug businesses on the side, and is mean as well. He's in a long-term relationship with Heidi (or possibly married to her, but this is not elaborated on) while in an adulterous relationship with Samantha.
  • Samantha (cat) - A prostitute and Bletch's mistress.
  • Harry (rabbit) - Satyristic MC who contracts "the big one", a fatal STD. It is apparently myxomatosis but Harry later finds out it's just "bunny pox."
  • Trevor (rat) - Bletch's enforcer. Directs pornography and manages the drug business on the side.
  • Arthur (worm) - Stage manager. His appearance resembles a book worm. Is an avid cigar smoker.
  • Sidney (Sid) (elephant) - Animal trainer. A manic depressive who thinks that he has terrible luck. Though he initially denies being Seymour's father, when Seymour is threatened with death in the slaughter which closes the film, Sid acknowledges him and runs to his rescue.
  • Sandy (chicken) - Has Sid's child out of wedlock. He denies it is his and for this, she is bringing a paternity suit against him.
  • Seymour (hybrid) - The baby of Sidney and Sandy. He is a half elephant and half chicken hybrid.
  • Robert (Wobert) (hedgehog) - A new member of the troupe. He has no vices. He falls in love with Lucile. Has a minor speech disorder: He pronounces the letter 'R' as sounding similar to the letter 'W'.
  • Fly-in-the-sky (fly) - Stereotypical paparazzo bent on breaking Harry's story. After he publishes it, Bletch and Trevor track him down, rip his wings off and flush him down a toilet.
  • Sebastian (fox) - The homosexual stage director with a penchant for sodomy - including an entire song about it. It is presumed he lost an eye during the film's events since the epilogue for the surviving characters shows him with an eye patch.
  • Wynyard (frog) - Addicted to "every barbiturate known to man". He is a Vietnam veteran who gets flashbacks about the war and throws knives for the show. He accidentally kills himself during his knife throwing performance. He could possibly be a parody of Kermit the Frog.
  • Lucile (poodle) - Chorus girl who falls in love with Robert after he courts her. At one point, Trevor drugs and attempts to rape her.
  • Barry (bulldog) - Bletch's driver and enforcer. After raiding the docks with Bletch and Trevor to gain drugs, a large spider bites his head off.
  • Cedric (wild boar) - A Scottish boar who is part of a large gang, a golfer and tries to double cross Bletch in a drug deal. He is killed when Barry stabs him with a knife.
  • Louie (dog) - Cedric's side-kick who is a stereotypical "mangy mutt". He is killed by being force fed borax by Bletch after finding out the drug trade was a scam.
  • Mr. Big (whale) - Cedric and Louie's boss. Bletch orders Trevor to drive his car through Mr. Big's mouth and they exit out of his anus. It presumably kills him.
  • Madam Bovine (cow) - Heavily pierced and large-uddered cow who stars in Trevor's porn. She is never seen again after the filming of the porn with Dennis.
  • "The Masked Masochist" (cockroach) - Actor in Trevor's porn. Dies after Madam Bovine unknowingly sits on his face and suffocates him. Trevor feeds his body to a monstruous whale-like creature.
  • Dennis (either an anteater or aardvark[citation needed]) - After "The Masked Masochist" dies, he is convinced by Trevor to take a part in the porn movie. It looks like semen drips from his nose and he has a penchant for sniffing panties. He dies after sniffing up borax.
  • Abi (human) - The only human character, an Indian snake-charmer and contortionist who physically appears to be a parody of Gandhi. Gets his head stuck in his rectum and when he pulls it out, a bed of nails crushes him.
  • Daisy (dog) - One of the few minor characters of the theater troupe that is given a name. Her name is mentioned by Heidi before the show's debut.
  • Dr. Quack (duck) - Harry's doctor who told Harry about his illness but later told him the truth when he found out what it really was.

The ending sees Heidi go on a shooting spree with an M60 machine gun and killing Samantha, Harry, Sandy, Daisy, Trevor and Bletch, among other surviving (nameless) members of the troupe. There is a brief epilogue sequence in which the fates of the notable survivors are shown. Sydney underwent surgery on his kneecaphorticulturist with his son Seymour. Arthur received an OBE for lifelong service to the theatre and retired to the country. Sebastian wrote a book about the film's events which, it is indicated, may be less than accurate, and is currently negotiating the film rights. Robert and Lucile got married, started a family and Robert became a professional photographer for a women's magazine. Heidi spent a decade in a female penitentiary, was rehabilitated into the community and now works under a new identity at a large supermarket. injuries and lives as a struggling

Here's some trivia from the IMDB:
  • Director Peter Jackson couldn't locate blank rounds, so the M-60 used in the movie is firing live ammunition.
  • When "The Feebles Variety Hour" finally goes live, one of the audience members is wearing the alien costume from director Peter Jackson's previous movie, Bad Taste
  • All puppets, no humans.
  • If you look closely at the audience of "The Feebles Variety Hour", it can be seen that most of the audience members are actually cardboard cutouts. Only a few are puppets or people in costume.
  • (Director's trademark) All of the vehicles in this movie are based on Morris Minors.
  • Not all characters in this movie are puppets. Among those that are played by actors in suits are Heidi (hippo), Bletch (walrus), Cederic (wart hog), Sid (elephant), Daisy (cow) and Barry (bulldog).